At the movies this weekend, I was forced to watch the trailer for What To Expect When You're Expecting, loosely based on the best-selling self-help book. It seems that this movie got the Garry Marshall treatment, which is to throw offers at as many actors as you can, see what sticks, and cast those who need the paycheck and have no artistic integrity. And there are so many storylines that each actor only has to film a few scenes. Everybody wins!Based on its successors, He's Just Not That Into You, Valentine's Day, and New Year's Eve, this will not be screened in any Feminist Studies College courses. The plot is likely derived of played-out stereotypes and predictable bad comedy scenes. In fact, I'll save you the time and the $10.50 by prediciting some major plot points:
- One (or more) of the pregnant women will have weird food cravings and hilarity will ensue while they find that exact concoction (i.e., chocolate covered-pickles).
- There will be lots of "comedy" from the superdads not using jokes, but showing that by being a stay-at-home dad has emasculated them will bring enough of the funny.
- Since pregnant women have tons of hormones coursing through them, they will act in insane and evil ways, but the husband has to put up with them.
- There will be a mishap with an accidental squirting of breastmilk.
- One or more of the women will go into labor at the same time at the same hospital, ending up with a large gathering of all the main characters. There may or may not be an accidental switch of babies.
- There will be an extended montage of the couples trying to assemble baby equipment (i.e., crib, stroller) but failing (insert lots of physical comedy here).
- One woman will insist on a natural birth, yet will yell for drugs once she is in labor. Ha ha!
- None of the couples will have any financial concerns, and spend a lot of the movie furnishing their new nurseries with pricey furnishings.
- One woman will have doubts about her ability to be a parent because she is surrounded by super moms, but there will be an inciting incident that will prove she is a good mother after all.
- Despite going through a grueling labor, J. Lo's makeup will remain perfect.
- One or more of the women will be upset about how fat they are getting.
