Don't Fear The Limey

There's something in the air, do you smell it? It's the heady aroma of luck, talent, timing, and excellent choices combining to create a mix of pure undiluted unstoppable star power. If the rumors are to be believed then you may be about to witness the birth of a legend.

What, you may ask yourself, am I going on about?

Do you remember when I gave out unsolicited advice to perpetually pained vampire juggernaut Robert Pattinson?

Yes, well how long did you think it would take him to scoop up these nuggets of career wisdom and run with them?

Thank you Dufmanno! Stellar advice.

Apparently it didn't take long at all now did it?


Yes, I know that most people visibly cringed upon hearing the news that Pattinson had been cast as the seminal, disengaged, limo riding billionaire  business man Eric Packer  from Don DeLillo's cold jarring masterpiece Cosmopolis.

Get in the limo.

But think about the combination of factors here.

You have an ice cold satire that takes place mostly in the claustrophobic confines of one stretch limo journey across town, helmed by the Barron of Blood, David Cronenberg.

Never has being stuck in crosstown traffic ever given birth to a series of situations so dire and I think this guy is at the perfect stage to portray that.

This is the same bloke who had to implore millions of teen aged girls, who wept openly in protest of his casting in the Twilight series as their hopes of a more generic Edward were dashed onto the jagged rocks of the Pacific northwest coastline, to just "give him a chance."

Never has a guy with this much clout had to beg for so much forgiveness.

Still think he's not a contender?

Witness his first perfectly chosen transitional role outside the Meyers universe to see exactly how crazy like a fox he actually is. Someone who is methodically and carefully cultivating his career made sure that all the love-starved romantics who will easily be pulled from the barely restrained lust and heaving that made Twilight such a sensation move beautifully into the theater seats so they can sit watching Water For Elephants over and over and over.

This is where he either succumbs to the dreaded "Mark Hamil Syndrome" or goes supernova, a phenomenon you don't see too often outside the Depps, DiCaprios, or Pitts.

So heed my words, barring any unforeseen glitches, I think this guy is moving to the big leagues.

You can stop shaking your head and laughing at me now, Chag.

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