Showing posts with label Toys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Toys. Show all posts

Ranked!: Top 15 Old School Games



For this week's Ranked!, we decided to take a look at our favorite games where you didn't need batteries, a computer, or a television (although many have made the electronic jump since) to have a good time.

15. Mousetrap

Before there were OK Go videos, there was Mousetrap. Like an intricately choreographed domino arrangement, players carefully assemble the Rube Goldberg machine in hopes that they can maneuver an opponent under the mouse cage. How was it assembled? I can't remember. How did you get your opponent under the cage? Couldn't tell you. Why? Because the whole marvelous point of the game was the machine, a spectacularly fun contraption with boots kicking over barrels, which deposit marbles onto ramps, which eventually trigger a diver to jump off a see-saw into a tub (if you were lucky... it wasn't the most foolproof machine) which would shake the cage off a pole (or halfway down the pole... again, not the most foolproof machine). Hours could be spent analyzing, constructing, and deconstructing the device without a thought to the game itself, which for my parents meant it was a game I could play alone. And THAT, as all parents know, is worth its weight in gold.--CroutonBoy

14. Cranium

You know what makes Cranium a great game? It combines elements from other games, namely Pictionary, Trivial Pursuit, and Scrabble. So basically, it's got something for everyone. This is a game that's fun for both creative and non-creative people. Are you a geek who's all about trivia? You're in luck, but there's a good chance you might have to mold something out of clay later.

Plus, I always loved the odd little mascots on the game's box.--Chris

13. Sorry!

In the years following my college graduation, my buddies and I hung out and played a lot of Sorry! Why would a bunch of young adults with the world at their fingers spend so much time on a board game designed for kids, you might ask? It's because Sorry! is a deceptively simple game that brought out our competitive spirit. For the uninitiated, the goal is to get your four pieces around the board to your safe zone before your opponents. Sorry! is more than just a game of chance. There's a bit of strategy as well as a social aspect. Players can sometimes send an opponent's piece back to the start. So it pays not to make enemies around the board. I've played a lot of Sorry! in my days and have recently introduced it to my kids. It's one of those games that has stood the test of time and literally proven to be fun for all ages.--Daddy Geek Boy

12. Life

One of the things that I always liked about the game of Life is that it has a finite end, unlike Monopoly, which you can play for days. It's a fun but simple premise: spin a wheel, move your car, get to the end. There's some light decision making, but nothing too taxing. Some of the outcomes are kind of funny. It's a good game to play with your family as it encompasses all kinds of age ranges. And it translated well to a game on my iPhone, which I really dig.--Archphoenix

11. Scrabble

Every game on our top 15 list is a game that I've played, some more than others. I've been playing all of them since I was a kid. Some fell by the wayside along the way (I was probably six the last time I played Mousetrap). Most of them have a lot of staying power, though--but no game more than Scrabble. I've always loved the game and, thanks to Facebook and Electronic Arts, it's the one game I play every single day. In fact, I usually have at least three games going at any given time. For someone who ostensibly writes for a living, I'm not very good at it--I lose about twice as often as I win. I guess I've never really gotten good at the strategy of the game. But that doesn't stop me from playing. It's a great game and it's the perfect board game for online play.

Which reminds me... I haven't played my turns today.--Dave

The Furby Rises Again

It took years to stamp out the unspeakable evil of the holiday must-haves from the past: Teddy Ruxpin, Chatty Cathy, and of course, Furby 1.0. But this season we have seen the reemergence of the last of these three horrors, the one-time champion of toy store marathon hunting season: the new and improved Furby.

The tag line alone (A Mind Of Its Own!) is enough to make any Terminator fan run for the mountains and start stockpiling weapons, but the eyes... my GOD THE EYES. Watching you intently. Waiting for you to make a mistake. Recording your every move for rogue government agencies operating off the grid! No, wait, not that last one.

The point here is that this abomination ended up on one of the three lists I had to send to the North Pole this weekend, and I doubt that delightful, white-bearded rogue will be willing to cart this robotic minion of Satan around in his toy sack. Therefore, it falls to me to find this hellish thing and bring it into my home.

My wish for your families this season is for health, happiness, and lots of rare and delightful pop culture finds, but the significance of the much maligned Furby makes me frightened for us all. Children want it. We remember it fondly for some reason (I suspect our memories have been tampered with ) and soon we will all have one.

Someone call John Connor.

Book Review: The Cult Of LEGO

As a parent, I'm more guilty than most of forcing the toys and activities of my childhood onto my daughter. As a daughter, she has shown a remarkable degree of resistance. She has grown up in a different world than I did, surrounded by electronic stimulation I only dreamt of, and since she's only six she has no appreciation of the retro-coolness of Slinkies or Operation. To complicate matters, she has embraced the aspects of girliness a marketer could hope for: princesses, makeup, cute fuzzy animals, blah blah blah. And I'm not exactly the person I was when I was that age either; my patience for the games and toys she likes to play with is tested daily by my own roaming attention.

But there's one thing we both agree upon. LEGOs.

LEGOs are the perfect toy. Colorful, sturdy, infinitely creative, and utterly immersive. She and I spend hours recreating everything in the instructions and on the box, then exploring every permutation of houses, cars, and living things we can imagine. When dinner is called, I'm just as likely to be the one who calls, "in a second!" as she is.

We are members of the Cult of LEGO. And we are not alone.

Nowhere is this more clear than in a new book, the aptly titled The Cult Of LEGO (John Baichtal and Joe Meno), which explores the myriad ways in which LEGO has permeated our culture and become an obsession for brick lovers around the globe. Packed with articles, interviews, and images of some of the most eye-opening uses for LEGOs you've ever seen, it's at once both a fascinating exploration of how a simple little brick, properly assembled, can offer endless possibilities, and a testament to the diversity and ingenuity of the human imagination.

The Culture Brats Holiday Gift Guide: You Know, For Kids!

For day three of the Culture Brats gift guide we look at ways to teach your kids about the awesomeness of the 1980s. And if some of these gifts end up with your name on them "by accident" we surely won't tell!

Item: Strawberry Shortcake Berry Cafe

Where to Buy: Toys 'R' Us

Description: The bitch is back! Strawberry Shortcake and all her scented friends are back, updated, and ready to play with your kids. There's a whole slew of Strawberry products now.

Who It's For: Girls who like pink.


Item: Hungry Hungry Hippos

Where to Buy: Toys 'R' Us

Description: A classic game of marble chomping hippo fighting.

Who It's For: Kids of all ages


Item: Wham! Upcycled Notebook

Where to Buy: Etsy

Description: Send your kids to school in style. Check out this Etsy shop for tons of retro albums recycled into notebook covers.

Who It's For: Cool kids who understand good music. Or their parents.


Item: New Playskool Alphie

Where to Buy: Amazon.com

Description: Remember the old Playskool Alphie? It was a little educational toy robot with cards that you loaded in to learn stuff. Well Alphie 2.0 is out for you to get for the kids of today.

Who It's For: Your smartie smart kids


Item: Trapper Keeper

Where to Buy: Amazon

Description: Granted, it's not nearly as awesome as the Trapper Keepers that we grew up with, but it is a Trapper Keeper. They're great for school kids to get organized. And hey, teach your kids how to use puffy paint and stickers to 80s this thing up.

Who It's For: Organized kids


Item: Lisa Frank sticker book

Where to Buy: Walgreens

Description: Lisa Frank, the designer of many collections of popular stickers sets of the '80s is back with an all new super collection of brightly colored stickers.

Who It's For: Sassy girls who like bright colors


Item: Fischer-Price Record Player

Where to Buy: Urban Outfitters

Description: Remember this? It plays plastic records with old children's tunes like "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and "London Bridge." Your kids will probably be confused because it doesn't have a touchscreen.

Who It's For: Kids who like music


Item: Stay Puft Gourmet Caffeinated Marshmallows

Where to Buy: ThinkGeek

Description: Collectible box. Marshmallows. Ghostbusters. CAFFEINE. Why haven't you bought these yet?

Who It's For: Someone with a sweet tooth. Anyone who works nights. Kids big and small.


Item: Monchhichi

Where to Buy: Amazon

Description: Is it a monkey? Is it a vague hominid? Is it a creature who should probably get those freckles checked by a dermatologist? Who cares! It's cute and cuddly and sucks its thumb. 'Nuff said.

Who It's For: For those who love to snuggle


Item: Rubik's Revolution

Where to Buy: Toys 'R' Us

Description: The Rubik's Cube updated to incorporate 6 electronic games that test your speed and smarts. As if the original wasn't frustrating enough.

Who It's For: Kids that are totally not impressed by your mad original Rubik's Cube skills


Item: Topps Garbage Pail Kids Flashback Stickers

Where to Buy: Topps Online Store

Description: The original Garbage Pail kids reissued to titillate a whole new generation of kids and irritate today's teachers.

Who It's For: Kids who like the gross out factor


Item: 80's Candy Decade Box

Where to Buy: Hometown Favorites

Description: Includes Candy Necklace, Mike & Ike Originals, Zero Bar, Wonka Bottlecaps, Cry Baby Tears , Smarties Big Roll and over 20 more... oh my god!

Who It's For: Parents. (Kids don't need all that sugar anyway.)


Item: Creepy Crawlers Bugmaker

Where to Buy: Amazon

Description: It's like an easy bake oven for bugs, sans the calories.

Who It's For: Aspiring mad scientists or pastry chefs.


Item: Bonnie Bell Lip Smackers Coca Cola Stocking

Where to Buy: Amazon

Description: OK, there's so much going on here I almost don't know what to say. You've got lip smackers, Coke (as always branding itself to high heaven with Christmas), and a Christmas stocking decorated with snowflakes and cola bottles. The only thing that's missing is a picture of that polar bear slathering on gloss all over his super smooth kisser. (Like that's not disturbing.)

Who It's For: Kids who don't like the chapping

Twisted Toys

This list isn't terribly '80s, but it cracked me up and I felt the need to share: 10 Toys That Will Permanently Screw Up Your Kid.

If the Inflatable Wolverine looked like Hugh Jackman's Wolverine, it would be on an altogether different list:



And how did NOBODY at Marvel say "you know, maybe not appropriate?"


The whole list is hilariously wrong. Though I kinda want that Russian Roulette set now.

Just Can't Get Enough Toys

Here's the deal... I have toy envy. Through a combination of limited funding and hippie parental disapproval of "consumerism," I was a kid that entered the '80s with more than one toy made out of rustic wood and a healthy dosing of "go outside and play." (Do you know what's outside? More rustic wood.) There were so many fabulous toys in the '80s and I didn't get, well, most of them, despite pressing my face up to the TV and salivating.

So I'm planning on reliving my youth vicariously through this book: Just Can't Get Enough - Toys, Games, and Other Stuff from the 80s That Rocked. Doesn't that title just say it all? The book cover looks like an old school Trapper Keeper (sweet!) and the reviews all mention hilarious commentary and nostalgic memories, which I think is pretty much the equivalent of Culture Brats writer heaven. Sure, I could buy my son a Care Bear or a She-Ra doll and live vicariously through him, but he just doesn't seem to "get it." So I'll skip the history lessons (and tearful arguments when he chucks that My Little Pony aside) and go straight to putting this on my Christmas list.

Because now that Halloween's over it's time to think about those things.

[source]

Teddy Ruxpin Wants Your Soul

Everyone knows the drill.

Stay as far away from puppets, clowns, and mimes as is humanly possible and never turn your back at a child's birthday party, lest you be devoured by all three at once.

No one, however, has laid out the dangers posed by one of THE most insidious toys to crawl zombielike out of the '80s toy market: Teddy Ruxpin.

Please observe:



This was the precursor to the Furby and all terrifying speaking furry toy robots that hit store shelves afterward, so you can look Teddy square in the eye during the machine wars that we will all be fighting in 2025 and know he started it all.

Just as John Connor predicted, it all starts with one know-it-all at Cyberdine Systems and the next thing you know your Honda Asimo droid is stabbing you with the cutlery and your Roomba stops vacuuming and eats your pets. It's a slippery slope, people.

So anyway, now that you have that chilling Dr. Frankenstein visual of the true evil origins of the Teddy Ruxpin, you need to go burn any remaining '80s toys that speak, coo, or move their eyes in a shifty manner because no good comes of these things.

If you decide not to heed my warning, don't blame me when you wake up in the middle of the night with this thing attached to your head while it sucks what remains of your soul out of your left ear.

Everyone else, welcome to the war against the machines.

Oh Monchhichis, Wherefore Art Thou?

Since I'm sitting here trying to wade through the vast wasteland of discarded stuffed animals tossed carelessly away by my uncaring children, I thought I would mention a fuzzy friend long since forgotten:

The Monchhichi.

Yes, the furry lovable porcupine monkey hybrid who could suck his/her own thumb and had the catchiest theme song in the entire world. I can STILL remember the words.

Never mind that I actually kind of looked like a Monchhichi before I discovered the miracle of facial waxing (it's the Sicilian cave woman DNA), they were cute, cuddly, and VERY popular.

With the cyclical waves of '80s toys and shows being dug up and recycled, I'm at a loss as to why this wasn't on some big wig's redo list.